Wednesday, December 05, 2007

ReadandLeavemeahelloafteryouredone!

The time reads exactly 12:31 am. It took a while for this page to load since I'm officially a dial-upper again which means that my DSL connection has been temporarily cut-off. Temporarily because we are subscribing to the cheaper version, don't ask me what I have no idea. Actually, I should be reviewing for an oral defense tomorrow, but I grew tired of it. But since I couldn't sleep thanks to the overwhelming effect coffee has on me (read: mild seizures), I told myself it was time to get my fingers working again on a writing job. I initially wanted to write an update on the fanfic I have neglected for two months now but I felt that I wouldn't do my readers justice at the state I'm in so I decided to just tinker with an entry first. Yes. I have readers and the official count is ten. Bwahahaha!

So now what? There were two episodes of my life that I have not chronicled in this humble journal of mine. One was my 19-teenth birthday and the other one was the life-changing retreat.

1. My last teenage birthday was fine. I got eleven roses because the Ate in Dangwa swindled Rhea. Haha! It was supposed to be a dozen, but it was the first time I got more than three roses and I was very happy thank you very much.:) I think I never did look forward to being nineteen just yet. It was an age I dreaded partly because of what lay beyond it: graduation, future, uncertainty, a freaking job, board exam etc. Those are heavy words, words of which I know nothing about. It might be terribly melodramatic to put it this way but I am terrified, way beyond terrified. I have got less than three months in college and I still don't know Commerce boy's name. Nah. Just kidding. It's the responsibility that frightens me and I'll leave it at that.

2. The Caleruega trip was fantastic. Firstly, it changed my agnostic views. I am now trying to put my faith back in place. Before I just had this superior being, now I have God. NAKERS. haha! Next, I had a taste of the responsibility I was mentioning up there and it got me howling like mad. I was crying for those who didn't get the insinuation (read: Here I am assuming that someone reads my crapload.) My youngest brother, not knowing I was in Batangas, accidentally informed me of this problem we were having at home which comprised of swear word-shouting between my family members. That was the exact moment in time when I realized how I am in love with my family. I actually thought I was a love-less person because I practically existed without having boy-love for the past nineteen years and then just that simple statement from my brother got my forehead scrunching up like hell and the tears flowing from my eyes and sobs coming from some deep reservoir in my soul that I didn't know existed! I felt helpless that day. I was far from home when I was needed. It hurt like hell. Really. Not being able to help. Gahd. That hurt. I don't ever want that happening again. Things are okay now it seems, and I hope it stays that way. What else about the retreat? Aha! I got some closure with some issues, yes it definitely is closure not some new beginning-shit. Haha! Then I had terrible sinned by having this mad infatuation with a priest. Haha. Just kidding.:) But I guess Father Cortel definitely was an instrument to how I think I've changed since the retreat. I'm nicer now.

Okay, that's enough of my inner-fears-unconditional-love-closed-issue thingy. What I want you to focus on right now, (read: Again, I am assuming that someone reads my crapload), is the date in this entry's header. DECEMBER 5, 2007. Yep. It's a very meaningful date for me. It's my second-year anniversary with Dongbangshinki. Hahaha! It might sound pathetic but ya, that's just me, the passionate-boyband-loving idiot,no offense to the millions out there like me.:) Another thing important about this day is, passport day. Yes! Rhea and I would finally claim our passports because, (read: this thing was what I wanted to blog about in the first place, got sidetracked.), next week...


WE WOULD BE GOING TO BANGKOK TO WATCH DONGBANGSHINKI IN CONCERT. FINALLY. FINALLY. BWAHAHAHA! WE WILL BE MISSING OUR EXAMS ON THE 17TH BUT WHO *SWEARWORD* CARES IF I AM GOING TO FINALLY GET MY TWO YEAR OLD DREAM!!WOOT. I AM ANTICIPATING THE CRYING AND THE SWEATING AND THE SHOUTING AND ALL IN ALL JUST TO EXPERIENCE DONGBANGSHINKI.

Enough of the capslock moment. We'd be staying there, we meaning myself, Rhea, my aunt, my mother, my mother's friend and her two daughters, for just three days since it was really hard to get bookings at this time of year. There are seven of us but I assure you that only Rhea and I would be watching the concert. :)

It's 1:17 am and I just finished rereading the whole entry. I am terrible at closing my paragraphs.:) Spent more time on this than I intially allowed myself to. Still not sleepy so I'm just gonna memorize some more cholera-stuff for the revalida tomorrow.

This is the first and last time I'm gonna request this, if you actually read this post, please do leave a hi okay? That seems like a weird request but I want to know how many people visit or not visit this.:) Thank you!:) Probably just this early-early morning bug got to me.:)

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

hi! omg! xtine! such a long time.... yeahh...

so just eavesdropped on what's happeneing... haha! tsismosang talaga... hahaha!

merry xmas!

Xtine said...

kitt!really!
bket k pa kc nag livejournal no!
miss kita!promise!
merry xmas jan!!

Anonymous said...

I finally got to read to your blog again! whew! namiss ko! nice entry Tin! :D